Oh How I Need a Nap!
Oh bother, drowsiness was taking over my body. Experience tells me if I battle through the feeling, it’ll pass after 45 minutes or so; but in the meantime I’ll yawn, fidget, gulp in great lung fulls of air, stand up, sit down, and walk down the hall for a glass of water every 15 minutes or so just to stay awake. These are never my most productive work sessions; but the alternative, taking a nap, yields too great a consequence. I’ve heard management isn’t keen on seeing employees passed out on their desks, drool dripping from the corners of mouths; so I bite my lip, chew gum, pinch myself, or whatever it takes to get through the next 45 minutes. All of a sudden, almost like a switch being thrown, the sleepiness passes; and I’m fine.
Sometimes similar sluggish periods hit my spiritual life. My prayers are listless, and when I read my Bible, I see the words but don’t comprehend their meaning. The whole process seems like a futile exercise.
“Why bother?” I sometimes ask myself. If I’m not gaining anything from what I’ve read or my prayers don’t even make sense to me, does it really matter to God that I spent time trying? Yet, I fear the consequence of not having devotions; so I press on. Where will I end up if I ignore God? Besides, I’ve set this time aside since I was a little girl, and it is one of my few good habits. After a day or two, again just as if a switch is thrown, my prayers are again focused and clear. The Bible comes alive, and I have insight into what God is trying to teach me.
Encountering dry times in my devotions is so much like my sleepy days at work. When I have “one of those days” on the job, I can almost always trace it back to staying up too late or overloading myself with extra curricular activities. When I hit a listless period in my devotions, I’ve foolishly let other things crowd my time for God, or I’ve allowed sin, such as jealousy or anger, to deaden my sensitivity to God’s Word.
I’ve found, although it may seem useless at the time, if I power through my devotions, God will honor my effort. He brings my numb heart back to life.